Love the ones you love.

What a bittersweet day.

On one hand, I got to hang today with some of the coolest, most beautiful gals and best friends a girl could ever imagine.

On the other, we were gathered to support our friend at the funeral of her father, a truly inspirational and amazing character whose legacy lives on through his children and grandchildren. A life truly well lived.

One day I hope you can read all about this simply spectacular individual. As one attendee today said, 'I feel really honoured to have been allowed to be here today'.

Well said.

The service was beautiful and I choked back tears throughout. I lost it, however, when I watched his two sons carry him out at the end.

What was amazing to me, was sitting with a fellow friend who was there in support of our mate but hadn't really gotten to know her dad, and throughout the service she said several things to me to the tune of 'OMG, THAT'S where she gets it from' and 'she's really like her dad, isn't she?' and the like. She is quite religious and shook her head at one stage, marvelling, 'it's true when they say you never really die', meaning that his children have inherited so many of his traits (good, bad and badder haha) that he will live on, regardless.

It's a wonderful and heartwarming thought.

Spending time with my favourite girls today once again filled my heart, despite sitting here with tears in my eyes regarding the circumstances. It is a shame that bad news is sometimes the only time we are drawn together with our loved ones, however I do think that any time with your loved ones is time to be treasured. Toasting this amazing man with a glass of champagne after the service was quite fitting, seeing as we probably sneaked enough booze off him as teenagers (ugh...oopss....)

Driving several hours today gave me a lot of time to think and I think I'm becoming (perhaps too much) sentimental in my old age. I'm not that much of a crier but it sometimes takes a tragedy to reflect and make you love those you love just a little bit more.

Having lost my own mum as a teenager, it's a lesson I learned early but life gets in the way sometimes and sometimes you need that jolt to remember to really love the ones you love.

Sappy I know. I said perhaps too much sentimental...

So there's my thoughts for the day. Make sure you love the ones you love today.

xx

Sundays. Scarlett. Self-management. Me?

What an amazing day!

I went outside after one of the nicest sleep-ins I had for awhile (9am thank you very much) and there was not a cloud in the sky. Glorious. The weather app says it got up to 20 degrees today, however I'd beg to differ as sitting in the sun I was toasty warm (having said that I was wearing trackies and thick socks at the time!). It's just after 4pm now and the temperature suddenly dipped about 15 minutes ago, chasing me inside the house to ensure these warmed-up bones stay that way!

So last night I stayed up late watching my all-time favourite movie...yes you guessed it, Gone With The Wind. It's unbelievable how they could make such an epic film in 1939 and how it has really stood the test of time. They really knew what they were doing, the burning of Atlanta was convincing despite special effects and CGI being decades from inception, and making such a strong female character in an era where women were meant to stand there and look pretty to catch a husband was pretty ground-breaking. Scarlett of course is my idol, as despite being capricious, selfish and manipulative, ultimately would do anything she had to to ensure the survival of herself and her loved ones. A survivor, not by choice but by circumstance. I think she defines the saying 'you never know how strong a woman is until you put her in hot water'.

I can relate.

So apart from a solo trip to the shopping centre to peacefully window shop without a shopping-allergic boy whining every two minutes (my feet hurt, are we going yet, this is boring), I've spent a lovely day at home that was relaxing apart from the washing machine issue, of course. After the brown-out we experienced the other night, my washing machine has now decided to play silly buggers and not work properly. It won't fill with water and none of the cycles operate for more than 10 seconds before the entire thing just starts beeping incessantly and won't play ball. Grr.

So in order to get two loads of washing done, I've had to manually fill the damned thing with water and detergent, mix them around a bit, drain the water (every 10 seconds), then refill to rinse...and repeat.

I felt like an olden day washerwoman and really could have used one of those old-school wringing thingies today. As it was I had to squeeze as much water out as I could, hang on the line all day and now I'm drip feeding them through the dryer to finally get the bloody things dry. Fun and games.

On the upside, I got a really cheap steam mop and used it for the first time today and it's BRILLIANT. Now I have no excuse not to have clean floors as with this wonderful new addition to my arsenal. I literally did the whole house in less than 15 minutes. Effortless and quick is the way I like my housekeeping. Domestic goddess I am NOT.

One of the best things about living here is watching E play outside in the sunshine and fresh air, something we sorely missed in Brisbane. We had no gardens or outdoor space at our building except for a patio, and the nearest park was a good 30 minute walk away. So I'm ashamed to say that little things like teaching E to ride a bike was put on the backburner.

He got an awesome bike for his birthday 2 years ago which was too large for him at the time. I tried to teach him a few times to ride on the pavement but it was the most frustrating experience that left E in tears and vowing that he HATED bike riding and simply wouldn't do it. I guess we just put the bike in the underground carpark and forgot about it, to avoid the post-traumatic flashbacks.

Now he's got a lovely long driveway and a really large concreted area near the garage to practice on, I decided that nearing 12 years old, it really was something we had to accomplish. I was envisaging more trauma, only to behold number one son hopping on, putting feet on pedals...and just going.

I guess all the ripstik practice has come in handy as he has amazing balance and literally was riding up and down the driveway immediately! In two weeks he's taught himself to turn and is well on his way to 'look mum, no hands!'.

Wow. So proud of him right now.

He's now looking forward to riding to school (maybe with another week's practice!) and showing off his 'mad skills' to all his mates.

Another son brag: his school uses this 'self management' system which to be honest, at first sounded like the same kind of hogwash that every other school spouts and then is never put into practice. I'm completely LOVING his new school as they actually are practising what they preach.

Each kid is taught to manage their own behaviour and to be accountable for what they do. At the end of each term, they have to perform a self-assessment, followed by a student/teacher discussion on the outcome and whether the teacher agrees with their assessment. A bit like a performance review. Should the child be found to be 'self-managing' they're eligible to attend a special end-of-term event (ie. this time it's bouncy castles and a BBQ).

I completely love this idea, and it allies closely with what I always tell E, which is to take responsibility for his own actions.

So E brought home his assessment on Friday to be signed and I have quite the hard little taskmaster! He was really tough on himself and after answering the questions on the assessment, determined himself to be 'Developing Towards Self Managing' with the comment:

I am developing towards self managing but I think I'm doing pretty well for the new kid.

Awww.

Luckily his teacher disagreed and thinks that he IS indeed self managing so he is very excited to be included among the special elite who get to bounce to their heart's content.

Good thing this wasn't around in my day as I have an inkling that I was entirely delusional and oblivious. Having said that, nothing was ever my fault so why should I say it was????

So excited for tomorrow's The Voice grand finale. It's going to be an amazing show and I'm just sorry it all seems to be finishing so quickly. I am still backing Karise to win, I don't think anyone could possibly knock her off her perch. The others are quite formidable but she truly is destined to be the next (and hopefully less tragic) Amy Winehouse.

Hope you're all having a lovely weekend! Back to the grindstone tomorrow, but actually looking forward to it being as I'm still 'new girl' and every day is exciting!

So weekend wrap-up:

• Discovered something new this weekend (bead shop) - check
• Did something silly (drunk at bead shop) - check
• Finished Deadlocked and now halfway through Tote Bags and Toe Tags - check
• Watched all-time favourite movie - check

Love it!

xx

It's a beautiful day

Glorious!

The bike master at work

Yes, you're awesome

Bead nirvana. And naughty thoughts about gourds.

Wow, what an absolutely fantastic day we've had today!

Woke up to a picture-perfect, sun-shiney day with barely a cloud in the sky. E and I enjoyed a nice snuggle in my warm bed before our our growling tummies eventually chased us out. We decided to head for Grand Central, the 'big' shopping centre in the city. I say 'big' which I guess is maybe fairly large by Toowoomba standards, but after living at Chermside for many years I have come to realise the entire thing could probably fit into one of the Chermside carparks. But it has everything we need and is reasonably easy to duck in and out of (provided you actually take notice of where you park, unlike last time) so it's all good.

After wandering around for a bit checking the place out and knocking over a decent grocery shop we headed home to enjoy the sunshine. With E playing happily on his ripstik down the driveway and me reading and soaking up some vitamin D, it was one of those wonderfully relaxing mornings that seem idyllic even whilst they're happening.

Then this afternoon my work-mate picked me up and we headed over to another colleague's place to enjoy a mid-afternoon glass (or 3) of pink champagne and a splash of early Madonna before heading to Highfields to the long-awaited and highly anticipated bead nirvana! With jokes a-flying about being tanked and the possibility of being arrested for drunk and disorderly in a bead shop (oh, the horror!) and many, many giggles, we arrived at the pearly gates of heaven.

OMG. Where has this place been all my life?

I suggested that we needed tracking devices as there was a very real possibility of losing me in there, never to be found again. If I thought the Mummy Tree Markets was awesome, then the bead shop is somewhere I want to LIVE in and eventually be buried there.  So I guess if I had gotten lost somewhere along the line, it wouldn't be the worst thing that could happen. Wandering around the several barns-worth of pretty things on a champagne high was a total kick.

Wall-to-wall ribbons, beads of every colour and description, Christmas decorations, wall hangings, knick-knacks, handbags, and inexplicably, gourds, all surrounded by beautiful gardens, an abundance of money trees and a coffee shop that served THE singular best flourless chocolate cake that has ever passed my lips...

I've found my religion.

Of course I couldn't resist stocking up on a few bits and pieces and have some wonderful ideas for some mobiles and things to decorate my place so stay tuned for my creations! First on the list is cinnamon sticks on the mantelpiece...just heavenly.

Naughty gourds.

So there was an over-abundance of gourds, some painted, some turned into ducks and other farmyard creatures and some dried for you to take home and do with what you will. Apparently you're limited only by your imagination and I've come to the conclusion my imagination MUST be limited as all I could think was dirty thoughts. One look at them and I was in stitches, mind firmly in the gutter.

Or that could have been the champagne.

Anyway it was easily the best day I've had in Toowoomba so far. I've laughed until I almost cried, exchanged random stories about drunken party shenanigans (I thought setting the Hilton piano on fire whilst doing shots was a highlight until I heard Angela's story about crawling out of elevators), indulged my girly side and even participated in some random theft of a few bits of a money tree for my garden.

I blame the champagne.

It's really coincidental after my work-mate and I were talking about money trees just yesterday. I had told her that I used to have an awesome one that started off so tiny and grew into a fabulous thigh-high plant that we even dug up and transported to the new home that my sister and I shared a few years back. And if you 'accidentally' break a bit off and let it fall on the ground (or in an entirely new garden, as can occasionally happen, randomly) it roots itself and begins to grow again. I was telling her that I really wanted to get some more as firstly they're so pretty and secondly they're apparently brilliantly lucky if you place them at your front door, as they're supposed to invite abundance and prosperity inside. Not sure what the stance is if you stole it in the first place but I guess time will tell.

So the money trees at the bead shop were really asking for it. It was a sign, I tell you. Two bits have 'accidentally' fallen into my front garden and will be located at the front door as soon as I get a pretty pot or two.

It was the champagne. My story and I'm sticking to it.

So now I'm coming down from a champagne high with a sore stomach from laughing so hard and eyeing all of my pretty shiny things to create something from.

And feeling somewhat grateful that none of us had to be bailed out of jail for drunk and disorderly at the bead shop.

Although that would have been a fabulous story to tell the grandkids.

xx

Things my mum said.

I have started to really notice that the older I get, the more I catch myself turning into my mother.

Every now and again I will say something to E that I realise MY mum said to me. It's a weird experience and one that cracks me up as I realise just how much influence my mother's words had on me, and ergo what influence I'm likely exuding over my son and his future actions.

Crap.

It made me wonder if any of my friends were experiencing the same thing and I decided to ask them for things they remember that their mums said. The results are pretty damned funny. And I strongly suspect a few of our mums must have colluded or else gone to the same school of motherhood back in the day.

My mum

My mum's fashion advice to my sister and I was to always let your boobs be bigger than your waist. Luckily she also gifted us with her genetically oversized mammary glands so even at my largest, it hasn't been a problem adhering to this mantra. Even when hugely pregnant my stomach barely exceeded the 'ladies'. In fact it's been said that my boobs enter the room about 5 minutes before I do. So there you go mum, advice taken.

Cathy

I spent a lot of time with Cathy's family growing up and can tell you that they're a cast of characters due at least one or more blog posts all of their own (in fact, there's already a few about - see here and here). Cathy's mum is awesome and regularly came out with some absolute pearlers. I've listed them below but won't steal Cathy's thunder in case she wants to write about them herself (hint hint).

Keep yourself nice - said every time you walked out the door
You look like the wreck of the Hespress
You are not a sausage - referring to how she described our school as the sausage factory

Brilliant stuff.

Sharee

Don't put it down, put it away

(mind you my stepmother has been saying that for 25 years and it hasn't yet sunk in).

Indi

Look in the mirror and then take something off. Less is more
Start trends, don't follow them
Can you stop dating dirty old rockers who our our age

Larissa

Do you think I came down in the last shower?

Julie

Stop walking around with a face like ditch water!
Stop being so melodramatic!

and my favourite...

Mum, have you seen my [insert item] here? 'Yes Julie it's swinging off my bottom lip shouting Tarzan'

Marie

If you sit on cold concrete you will get piles
No, that's not a laxette, that's chocolate for being a good girl this week
If the wind changes, your face will stay that way
One day you will have a daughter and see for yourself how hard it is to raise a child like you

Marie's mum also gets the award for most creative for this one:

In response to yelling at her brother 'why don't you frigging be nice' (thinking 'frigging' was a nice word for the bad F word) her mother informed her that 'frigging' was something that prostitutes do!

Priceless!

And then of course there's the old pearls of wisdom (over)used by every mum, everywhere:

Back in my day...[insert overly dramatic event here such as walking barefoot to school through the wind/rain/snow/cyclone etc etc]

Because I said so!

and...Wait until your father gets home!

The father one was especially effective for me, which was kind of weird seeing as my mum was the disciplinarian and dad was always kinda laid back and cool, but it struck fear into my heart every. single. time.

What did your mum tell you? Do you catch yourself saying the same things to your kids or are you guilty of an entirely new set of word crimes? I'd love to hear from you, feel free to comment or do your own blog post and link back to the comments.

Don't forget to follow me by hitting on 'subscribe' below.

xx

Grab a man before the music stops...

On news.com.au today there's an interesting article where the Catholic Church has warned girls to stop being picky and grab an available man, any available man, at an early age to marry. Or else you'll miss out.

The Catholic Church can generally be relied upon to provide great giggle fodder. Usually I avoid religious topics as it they're dangerous waters (what do they say, no religion or politics at the dinner table?) but I decided I'd like to swim with the sharks today.

So here we go.

Now let's get this out of the way quickly before I get accused of religion-bashing. I'm not especially church-y, however definitely not an atheist either. I believe in something, I just haven't yet defined what it is. I just don't think whoever made us would have given us thoughts, intelligence (debate for another day) and the ability to feel things so intensely if there wasn't some giant purpose to it all. However I have been brought up to question things, analyse and investigate to find truth, so I find it hard to just wholeheartedly believe in something I've been told without having to query it first. I did quite a bit of studies into various different religions at school and it only confused the issue - if this religion is right, does that make the other wrong?

Anyway, let's just say I've been brought up to believe that if you live by the Ten Commandments you can't go too far wrong - don't lie, don't steal, don't kill, don't covet things and don't steal the neighbour's hubby, they're the basic tenets of my life. Can't say I've nailed them but isn't life a work in progress?

To be honest I'm really envious of those who have genuine faith, as they seem so content and fulfilled in their lives and so grateful for all the small things. I have a couple of friends who are believers and I love to talk to them as their eyes shine when they speak of their faith and it's beautiful.

So back to the topic at hand.

Should us ladies give up on finding Mr Right to snatch up Mr Available before the age of 25, just so we don't miss out on marriage?

The article says there is a dearth of available men between the ages of 25 to 34. Basically there's 15 women to every man. Lucky men.

Mind you, 'available' is defined as unmarried, single, heterosexual, earning over $60k a year and NOT a single parent. Interesting criteria, does a man with a child make him not a good catch? Maybe at 24 I would have agreed but at my age I think a daddy who loves his child is actually a pretty big draw.

The article does raise an interesting question, particularly as I'm at my age and still unmarried. In the quest to have it all, are women missing out on marriage? Or is the church placing too much importance on marriage as opposed to happiness and fulfillment? Of course the church needs marriage as that's the only way we can reproduce right? (oops). But what about love?

Should we be latching onto someone who ticks a couple of boxes, rather than holding out for someone special?

Personally I don't hate being single. Mine and E's lives are calm and centred and we get to live how we want. I'm pretty independent and don't like someone in my face all the time, I feel smothered really easily. Of course I'd love to find a man who would enhance our lives, but until that day comes I'm content to live as we are. Better that than being with someone who doesn't make me happy.

Of course I realise that I'm probably the anomaly here. For starters I have a child so my biological clock isn't about to explode in case I miss out on having kids. And I like to spend time alone, which I know many don't. I don't need a man to make me feel complete, I AM complete. So until I can be 'happily married' or partnered or whatever I'm OK with being single.

Personally articles like this really annoy me because they play on our fears that we're going to be old and alone and miss out on the big white wedding we've all been dreaming about and planning since we were little.

So what do you think? Do you think that women are missing out on marriage because we're too picky, is the church too focused on women sucking it up for the purpose of marriage, despite whether or not it makes you happy? Are you afraid that when the music stops you'll be left alone? I'd love to know.

xx